Reason and Purpose

The majority of men live in isolation, do mostly what others expect of them, and most tragically live in fear.  To break this intergenerational pattern of obstructed self actualization requires concerted, informed, and purposeful action.  The men’s group is a prerequisite to the individual change through which men can realize their optimal potential.

The legacy of men is Saturnian.  It is driven by fear of women and other men.  The same kind of fear that drove the infamous Roman god of legend, Saturn, to eat his children to protect himself from their inevitable seizure of his powers.  Inspite of his efforts, Saturn nevertheless was dethroned by his son Jupiter.

Throughout history this legend has burdened men, each generation fearing the loss of power, real or imagined, to the next generation, and the next generation fearing never having the power of the previous one.

Of all the myriad of emotions, fear is the most debilitating.  Because of the insidious power struggles inherent to the lives of men they cannot admit to being governed by fear to themselves let alone others.  To acknowledge the prominent role of fear in their life is to risk feeling unmanly and shaming by others.  So isolation deepens.

Unable to share their fear and learn to overcome it, men compensate.  Men boast of their big and powerful cars, expensive homes, financial prowes, titles, and golf scores as a means of hiding just how small they feel.  These and other similar strategies, however, are pathetic substitutes for empowerment.  As the late great American philosopher Pearl Baily expressed it, “Them’s what think they is, aint”.

The cost of the Saturnian legacy is enormous.  North American men die, on the average, eight years before women.  They are four times more likely to be substance abusers and also four times more likely to take their lives.  They are eleven times more likely to spend time in jail.

The men’s group is a response to this reality.  A reality which at times can be quiet obscure but nevertheless real.  The group is a safe place to begin to grow to know what it means to be a man and than start becoming one.